The Magnifying Glass of a Woman's Behavior
The unequal accountability begins at a young age. Girls are expected to apologize for anything that is unbecoming of a lady – raised voices, assertion, being commanding, dominating, running, getting dirty, aggression, etc. This programming of our childhood teaches us to be more aware of how our actions affect others as we are constantly told that we should not inconvenience or upset other people. The team player programming carries over into our adult lives. Any woman who is aggressive is labeled as being uncooperative, not a team player, a “bitch,” and other derogatory terms. And so we sit at tables in submissive positions with our hands underneath, taking up as little space as possible. We shrink into the corners and we are overlooked and talked over because the prominent word out of our mouths every single day, is “I’m sorry,” just as we were taught to say as young girls.
"The team player programming carries over into our adult lives."
Stop Apologizing for Being You
Stop. Stop apologizing for being smart, strong, capable, and independent. If you don’t agree with your male counterparts, so what. You don’t agree. It has nothing to do with your character or your personality or your morals. Stop hiding in corners. Stop sitting with your hands clasped together in your lap under the table. Instead take up as much mass as you can. Command that attention that you’ve earned. You have nothing to apologize for. If your strong behavior is upsetting to a man, that’s his problem, and not yours. If your intelligence is upsetting to a man, that’s his problem and not yours. If a man attempts to mansplain something to you that you are an expert in, don’t let him. Stop him in his tracks and call him out on it. If people call you names, so what, they’re just words. Words only have power over you if you let them have power over you.
"Words only have power over you, if you let them have power over you."
Shatter the Mirrors that Confine You
If you have been a slave to fashion all your life feeling like you won’t be taken seriously if you don’t look a certain way, then throw your mirrors out the door. Your looks do not define your character. Your looks do not define your intelligence. You can wake up in the morning, ditch the shower completely, and leave the door without any makeup on and you will not lose one ounce of your skills, intelligence, or brain cells. Clothing is nothing more than plant, animal, or synthetic fibers that have been converted into fabric and structured onto your 3D form. Clothing serves only two purposes: to cover and to protect the body. It has no magical traits or special features outside of that. It’s purely vanity. Your looks do not define you. Stop letting anyone say that they do. Shut them down by calling them out on the behavior
"Your looks do not define you. Stop letting anyone say they do."
Let You Define You
It’s time women step up and claim our place in our society as being strong, capable, and smart. The cookie cutter of the half-crazed dumbass cult-obsessed soccer mom or money grubbing starlet or the betty homemaker who fawns upon her man with cookies are stereotypes that have been promoted by mainstream political spectrums, sitcoms, and reality TV shows (where there is nothing real about them). Women, it’s time to release your lion roar and smash those mirrors. Step into the leadership positions that you worked hard for and you know you deserve but were told you weren’t good enough. You are far better than anyone gives you credit for and you will see it as soon as you learn to stop apologizing for being you.
There’s no such thing as perfect beauty. It’s an illusion that costume designers sell to their audiences. Perfection is not only unattainable, it is also boring. Nature is far from perfect and look how beautiful it is because of it.
Let you define you, and no one else. If they don’t like you, so what. That’s their problem, not yours. Don’t change who you are just so people will like you. That’s not being true to you.